Friday, March 23, 2012

I'm calling it a miracle.

As of today, I've officially lost 30 lbs. since I began my daily count of consistent exercise. It's day 57 of that journey, and day 38 of my juice fast journey. Realistically, I have about 70 lbs. to go to get to my "healthy" weight range (according to doctors and charts, etc.). I think I'd be ok with losing just 50 more. There's no rush, really. The effects of what I'm doing now are already healing my body in miraculous ways. There is one in particular I'd like to share, if you don't mind.

Some people get very uncomfortable during talk of menstruation, and I was one of those people for all of my life. My friends, including some males, would get on to me, telling me it was a beautiful part of my body that I should embrace. I would just shake my head, shudder a bit, and refuse to talk about it. For a very long time, I used other words to replace the word "period" like "that time of the month." I also resorted to naming it "George," you know, something very non-feminine. I cringed at commercials that talked about pads and tampons. (Pads were gross to me, so I wouldn't use them or refer to them at all. I called tampons "bullets" so I could "shoot George." I really hated "George.") The whole idea made me feel really gross like I was the carrier of this horrible disease that no one should ever talk about, and I would take commercials from Tampax, Kotex, or blah-blah-ex/ax brand selling their *amazingly* absorbent materials very personally. My face would often get red during said commercial breaks. I don't embarrass too easily, so I think you get the point that this was something I did not discuss. Never ever.

Obviously, that isn't the case today. Over the past few months, I've come to terms with this part of my body. I have accepted that it is a natural occurrence, but it actually did not occur naturally within my body as it would most other females. Because of my PCOS condition, I developed amenorrhea, and I would menstruate maybe once every year or year and a half. I can probably count how many times I've had my period throughout my life. My former mindset celebrated the fact that I "didn't have to deal with having a period" since I detested the process so much. As my mindset changed and focused towards health, I knew something was very wrong with my body and I needed to do everything I could to change it.

On March 5, almost a month into my juice fasting and just over a month into my daily exercising, I menstruated for the first time in about 2 years. I never thought I would be so happy to have my period, but I cried tears of joy. And for whatever reason, I knew it was going to be a normal thing for me from then on out. Sometimes, when you know, you know, and since that was the longest I had ever gone without menstruating, I knew that it was my body's way of responding to what I am doing to make it stronger and healthier every single day.

Now, I talk about this more than I've ever talked about it before, and gladly so! Thank God for this! I am ecstatic! I believe that this is my body healing itself without needing medication or anything really crazy. It's just taking care of itself because I'm doing the right things to improve my overall health. I needed this miracle to prevent any further damage that was happening inside me, and I am most definitely looking forward to every single time of the month - sorry, every period ;) - as something positive and beautiful, just as I am in all parts of my healthy, amazing human body.


Casey Smith said...

That's just beautiful (well, about as beautiful as a period can be.)

livin wide said...

congratulations doll!! can't wait to see pictures...that's such an amazing accomplishment!

Mike and Sydney said...

I am just so impressed by you. A juice fast is always something I have wanted to do, but have never fully made the commitment. I have done all raw food, and that makes me feel fantastic. I can't even imagine what an all juice one would do! I truly feel that you can heal your body with food, and this just solidifies my belief. I am so glad to hear that things are going well for you and I look forward to continuing to read about your journey.